So the other night, an old friend rang up and invited me to her wedding (after what must be the longer engagement in history - a decade?). And, as it is every time I get invited to a wedding, I started to fret about what the hell I am going to wear to it. I fret, because in general I don't feel comfortable in dresses, and yet feel that I have to turn up looking glamorous.
I was in one of those up-market fashion boutiques today (bonus - there are winter sales on everywhere) and ended up spending an indecent amount of time admiring my legs in the mirror...
I know! I've always hated my legs for being the short and chunky lil tree trunks that they are...but in that dressing room, in front of that mirror...I didn't have tree trunks - I had gams. Pins, even.
It got me thinking that maybe I'd look pretty damned fine in short skirts after all.
And then I remembered that this incredibly flattering reflection was probably due to three things:
1. high heels,
2. opaque tights in the blackest of ultra-slimming blacks and
3. that old warhorse, the slimming mirror.
Of course! I was about to be conned into buying that skirt by a dirty, lying mirror. Like the mirror that Snow White's stepmum had, but the opposite. More like...a salesman's mirror.
I got outa there before I bought anything. Whew!
8 comments:
That mirror reminds me of the waitresses who always seem to like everybody.
To the extent of even calling you "Hun".
Oh, are you bow legged? In Japanese, it's called 'daikon ashi'. Daikon are those large white Asian radishes and ashi means leg.... very common.
I'm sure you could throw together a nice outfit from your closet. In most ways, women have it MUCH easier in terms of clothing for formal events than men. For example, a woman could quite nice in a skirt/dress and simple top, often times technically a tee shirt. If a man looked sharp in nice pants and a shirt and blazer but didn't wear a tie, some people would think he was the biggest douchebag for showing up like that. I'm sure you'll look nice :-) definitely a double standard
nigel: do they flirt with you in the hope of getting a bigger tip?
jon: actually, no. My legs are just short and muscley. you're quite about the gender bias that gives us women a greater range of clothing options. But I also reckon women come in a wider range of body shapes, so are less likely to find something off the rack that fits properly.
is it Desiree?
kazzer: that's the culprit!
Darn tootin'
Yes, I confess - it's me!
When do you want to go shopping Violet?
the bride: I've been doing a bit here and a bit there already, but I'm so faffy when it comes to deciding whether to buy that I hate to impose that on a shopping companion. If you know of a dress shop that caters to women of the "petite" persuasion let me know...
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