Tonight's class was a heckuva lot more uncomfortable than last week's. For a start, the midwife showed us a birth video. Apparently this birth was a nice, easy one. All the same, there's something about watching a woman pant from the effort and pain of squirting out a real, live baby, all the labour of it showing on her face, that made me want to reconsider the possibility of asking for a caesarian. It was full-on; I didn't really want to see her anus all stretched out from the pushing, even though that was the only way I was going to see the baby pop out of her other oriface (she was on all fours).
No matter how civilised we humans are, childbirth brings us right back to our most primal, animalistic state.
The other reason why the class was so uncomfortable is that there weren't any get-up-and-talk sessions like there were last time. Two hours is a really long time to stay seated - for me right now, anyway. We talked about the different stages of labour, SIDS (Sudden Infant Death Syndrome), infant resucitation, and why we shouldn't put the baby on synthetic bedding. Interesting as it was, I had a really hard time keeping still. First my bum started getting sore, then my legs started getting restless. I'd cross and uncross my legs, sit on one bum cheek then the other, sit up straight then slouch. It really distracted me from the discussion.
Every couple received a bag of freebies from Johnson and Johnson. Among the baby soaps, moisturisers and nursing pads was a small sachet of KY lubricant. Hmmm...